First pregnancy & abit down!

[xSugarx]

Hey people,

I'm a 20 year old & I just found out i'm pregnant due 4th June 2011 with my first I'm over the moon and excited but i'm currently in a situation that sometimes, gets me down.

I moved 178 miles away from my Home town in May this year, from my family and friends to be with my OH. I found a job, tried to make friends hobbies etc, but no luck..

My OH is in the Army, and is away an awful lot - put it this way, he was suppose to be off tonight and we was suppose to go in untill he had a voicemail of his Sgt Major and he had to run off to go to work until Sunday 6pm.. He is a nice decent guy, but he is manly man.. he doesn't understand an awful lot about pregnancy, I don't get on with his Family either - well we did, but following an petty argument - his eldest sister is jealous of me getting pregnant she did admit this to her brother after disgusting text messages and phone calls she was leaving me last saturday night, although she is mother of two under 10 she has been trying for years with fail. so therefore, doesn't want nothing to do with me, his mum has mental health issues not prejudicing against mental health, but she tends to stay on her daughter side, and his youngest sister well more interested in her self which is like most teenagers I suppose!

I'm just lost, i'm sat here on my own.. my friends in my hometown isn't as close anymore as I don't see them just speak on Facebook, but when I try to explain how i'm feeling they just say i put myself in that situation etc. I got pregnant etc etc ... Ive tried pregnancy classes and I suppose i'm just too shy to go up to somebody and speak and mostly, there with their partners. It may be my hormoans probably getting too me, I just feel so alone my life consists of working and sleeping.



Sorry to have a big massive rant xx

 

[misscrazycooki]

I feel for you hunny. I moved away from my family last year in the end I ended up going home I had had enough of being used and hurt by my ex. I was going to end up in a hostel because he beat me up and his dad tried it on with me so his family hated me so I had no one.

I think you should think about whether its worth asking your family if you can move back with them? Else View your worrieds with your partner....

Because I hated being on my own and struggling to make friends and working my butt off. Your pregnant and its not the end of the world you can go home and get all the support you need.

 

[flexilexi394]

Hey
I'm 20 as well, having my first baby.
It's hard at the best of times in tri 1, I struggled a lot. An felt down and not ready and all the rest of it, it's so scary. And especially if you're on your own a lot it can make it a lot harder. I agree, maybe see if you can move back with family, and at least you have their support. Xxx

 

[xSugarx]

My partner is good too me don't get me wrong, and I've got a job and a mortgage up here so kind of trapped I can't leave easily. Maybe it's my hormones I'm a strong cookie. It's alot harder to make friends up here (Wales) especially if your not really around here, and don't speak Welsh. Xx

 

[misscrazycooki]

arr didn't know you had ties :S sorry about that hun x erm I'd just talk to your other half about it. Maybe visit your family for a while. while he is away so your not on your own so much. x

 

[Sunnyb]

I was exactly the same when I had my little boy, but the opposite way around.
I lived about 40 miles away from my family & my husband worked shifts & ended up late home very frequently. I made friends in my maternity classes, but thought it'd better to move back to my home town to be near family.
It was like moving back to a totally different place - lots of my friends had moved away & others had older children & I knew nobody with babies of a similar age. It took me ages to get re-established & get to know my health visitor.
I think if you carry on going to classes you'll make a network of friends & if you can't then you need to discuss it with your OH.
I'm just saying that going back to your home town isn't always as great as it might seem.
Give it some thought, see how your hormones settle too.
It's not easy & I hope you can sort it out hun.

Sunnyb xxx

 

[Sera-tonin]

I can relate to you too. I moved to England with my OH 2 years and we have had a heck of a time meeting people! We still have not met very many people. My OH travels for his job too, and is away about 50% of the time (South America, South France, Russia etc) and I get left on my own...

Pregnancy is difficult in the first trimester especially when you are alone, but it gets better. Maybe try a new hobby...
Good luck and feel free to vent!
xS

 

[amandapanda]

Awww I feel for you hun, it sounds like you are really isolated - and his sister is out of order!! I wonder are there any other army wives nearby? They often form support groups cause they are all in the same boat of moving around alot and husbands & partners being away alot. They may take you under their wing! I was very down during my 1st trimester - my partner lives in London and I live in Sheffield, so I did feel like I was going through it kind of alone most of the time. Another option may be for you to invite your family and friends to stay up with you regularly - if you are busy at work in the week and have friends staying at the weekend then you won't feel so alone xx